#67 - The dangers of comparison!
25 Jun 25
It is really easy to think that everyone else is doing so much better than you. People beat themselves up unnecessarily when in reality, we are all walking slightly different paths.
Some of those paths may be easier than others...at that point in time. The challenge of each person's path will vary as time marches on.
Instead of falling into the comparison trap, celebrate your own successes which are good progress 'for you'.
You'll feel much better for it!
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#67 - The dangers of comparison!
What?
In any high-tempo, high-performing environment, it's really easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself against others.
People automatically look at those they believe to be in their 'cohort', perhaps of a similar age, background or common experience.
The start to fret about where they are in the 'pecking order', a view perhaps distorted by one's own subjective perception or interpretation of personal performance.
Perhaps even further corrupted by a belief that some people are just 'born lucky' or have been fortunate enough to be selected to climb the 'golden escalator'.
Why?
Why is it such a problem?
Comparison seems harmless, but in leadership and career development, it has real consequences:
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It distorts your perspective. You measure your success against someone else's highlight reel, not their reality.
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It disrupts your decision-making. You chase what looks good externally, rather than what aligns with your values and goals.
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It damages morale, yours and your team’s. When leaders fall into the comparison trap, they unintentionally pass that pressure down.
So what is the truth?
The truth is that everyone is swimming in a different lane with different conditions, experiences and constraints.
Some started early. Some are recovering from setbacks. Some are balancing personal storms you’ll never see.
Some will be 'racing snakes', some will be 'steady eddies', others 'tail-end Charlies'. People fall into a category, but do not necessarily stay in the same category forever. Most people will move between them depending on what else is happening in their life.
In the corporate world, the path isn’t linear and success is rarely as clean-cut as it looks from the outside.
How?
So how do you break out of this corrosive cycle?
To start with you need to embrace the realisation that everyone is different whether we like it or not. There is no such thing as a homogenous group, no such thing exists. As people mature then those differences become more pronounced. Everyone's life circumstances, which have always been varied, also become more acute as people move on with their lives.
Then, consider the following:
1. Define what success really means for you.
Not based on title or salary but based on contribution, balance and fulfilment.
2. Track progress, not proximity to others.
Your only meaningful benchmark is where you were yesterday.
3. Celebrate others without questioning your worth.
Their wins don’t devalue your journey. They offer perspective and possibility.
4. Lead visibly and authentically.
Model this mindset for your team. Dismantle the culture of comparison by openly acknowledging that growth happens at different speeds.
In Summary
I hope that you enjoyed reading this newsletter and that it has given you food for thought.
Comparing yourself with others is wasted energy. By all means celebrate everyone's success, but be particularly proud of your own. You have achieved much despite the other challenges that life invariably throws at you.
Others may be racing ahead right now, but there is a chance that you may overtake them at some stage whenever they experience their own challenges.
Have a great week!
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